Skip to main content

Funniest Classic Pinoy Jokes That Won't Make You Laugh

1

OMG

Mother of a bishop:
Alam mo, nang maging bishop ang anak ko, proud na proud ako tuwing tinatawag siyang "Your Excellency."
Mother of a cardinal:
Huwag ka! Nang maging cardinal ang anak ko, para akong nasa ulap kapag tinatawag siyang "Your Eminence."
Mother of a model hunk:
Kayo na ang mag-ako! Para akong nasa langit sa tuwing may nakakakita sa anak ko at napapasabing "Oh my god!"
2

Noah Picked a Wrong Couple

After the flood, all the animals from Noah's ark went out in pair – one male, one female – to multiply and populate the earth. In one dark corner, Noah noticed two snakes lingering and cuddling. "Why are you still here?" Noah asked the snakes. "Go! Go out and multiply!" "We can't," said the snakes. "And why is that?" asked Noah. The snakes replied, "We're both male."
3

Wala Talaga

Teacher: Iho, bakit ba laging sabug-sabog 'yang buhok mo? Wala ka bang suklay?
Pupil: Wala po.
Teacher: Bakit 'di ka manghiram sa tatay mo? Wala ba siyang suklay?
Pupil: Wala po siyang buhok.
4

Jesus Saves

Jesus and Lucifer accepted a challenge to create the greatest mobile app without using their own powers. Manually, they both entered thousands and thousands of codes. Then suddenly, a power cut happened.
After an hour, the power was restored. Furious, Lucifer banged his computer because he lost all his files. Meanwhile, Jesus continued to work on his app.
"How come you are still working on your app? You're a cheater. You used your power!" Lucifer furiously accused Jesus.
Jesus smiled, "No. I didn't use my power."
"Then how come you didn't lose all your files?" Lucifer stupidly asked.
Jesus replied, "Because Jesus saves!"
5

Toothpaste

Dentist: O, nanay, linisin lagi ang pustiso. Kahit dishwashing liquid lang, puede na. 'Di naman kailangang toothpaste.
Patient: Doc, toothpaste na lang din. Ayoko ng dishwashing liquid.
Dentist: Bakit naman?
Patient: Pakiramdam ko kasi, may suot akong plato.
6

What Day Is Sunday

Jewish: Wow! So this is how Holy Week is in the Philippines. The Filipinos are busy everywhere.
Pinoy: Tama ka diyan, kapatid. Kami lang yata ganito katinding mag-observe ng Holy Week sa buong mundo.
Jewish: I believe your observance of Holy Week starts on Ash Wednesday.
Pinoy: Tama ka diyan! You know some Christian practices. I'm impressed.
Jewish: And it ends on Easter Sunday, right?
Pinoy: Tama ka diyan! Ang galing mo bro!
Jewish: So, what day is Easter Sunday?
Pinoy: It's on Wednesday.
🤣

Popular posts from this blog

How To Block The Globe Broadband Malware From Your Browser

If Globe broadband may have hijacked your browser recently, and has been annoying you each time you open your browser, here's a way to stop this malicious malware from pestering your online quality time.
Reset Your Browser Resetting your browser means setting it to its original clean state. It's like having a just installed browser. For Chrome, you go to settings and click Advanced Settings. Down below you will find the Reset command. For Firefox, from the menu click the help icon (?), choose Troubleshooting Information, then click the Refresh Firefox button.
For other browsers, the reset function does the same thing. It simply varies with the terms used by the browser. What is this Globe BroadBandStatus2 Malware?  The malicious URL, which is broadbandstatus2 dot globe dot com dot ph slash fup (warning: do not visit the site), shows your broadband data usage for the month. If your usage is almost up to the maximum limit, it reminds you that your Internet speed connection will…

I-Witness's "Minsan Sa Isang Taon" By Kara David

A beautiful documentary that subliminally projects an irony of life.

"Minsan Sa Isang Taon" (Once A Year), an I-Witness documentary (aired Oct 8, 2012, GMA Network) by Kara David may look like a simple documentary but it's not. It's depth has significant things to say.

"Minsan Sa Isang Taon" weaved paper bills (cash, money) to be the irony of abaca, also called Manila hemp. A year of hard work produced 20 kilos of abaca fibers. When sold, those fibers are worth 1000 pesos. Imagine earning 1000 pesos a year for a family of more than 5! Those cash bills that the hard-working man was holding were made of a few fibers of abaca compared to 20 kilos of fibers that he produced for a year. Quite an irony!

We perceive money as symbol of wealth; yet what it's made of is a symbol of indigence. What happens now to the truth that hard work is the key to success? Somewhere in between must be missing.

The abaca farmer is surrounded with gifts of nature - hills, tre…

What is rice wine in Tagalog?

Some words to enrich your English-Tagalog vocabulary. tapuy, Tagalog. rice wine, Englishtuba, Tagalog. sap from coconut flower made winelambanog, Tagalog. Philippine vodka, made from coconut